Never say about anything, I have lost it, but say I have restored it.
Genuine
Yes. In Enchiridion (Handbook) (107), Section 11 (opening sentence); George Long translation, chapter XI.
Found word for word by program in the Greek original and in George Long’s English translation.
- Work
- Enchiridion (Handbook) (Ἐγχειρίδιον), 107
- Where
- Section 11 (opening sentence); George Long translation, chapter XI
- Found at
- Paragraph 27 of the Greek text, 24 of the English
- Translation
- George Long
Researched by AI; checked by program against the full text on 31 October 2026. Editorial review: pending. How we check
On the page
[…] If it be abusive words, you will find it to be patience. And if you have been thus formed to the (proper) habit, the appearances will not carry you along with them.
Ἐφ’ ἑκάστου τῶν προσπιπτόντων μέμνησο ἐπιστρέφων ἐπὶ σεαυτὸν ζητεῖν, τίνα δύναμιν ἔχεις πρὸς τὴν χρῆσιν αὐτοῦ. ἐὰν καλὸν ἴδῃς ἢ καλήν, εὑρήσεις δύναμιν πρὸς ταῦτα ἐγκράτειαν: ἐὰν πόνος προσφέρηται, εὑρήσεις καρτερίαν: ἂν λοιδορία, εὑρήσεις ἀνεξικακίαν. καὶ οὕτως ἐθιζόμενόν σε οὐ συναρπάσουσιν αἱ φαντασίαι.
Never say about anything, I have lost it, but say I have restored it. Is your child dead? It has been restored. Is your wife dead? She has been restored. Has your estate been taken from you? Has not then this also been restored? But he who has taken it from me is a bad man. […]
Μηδέποτε ἐπὶ μηδενὸς εἴπῃς ὅτι «ἀπώλεσα αὐτό», ἀλλ’ ὅτι «ἀπέδωκα». τὸ παιδίον ἀπέθανεν; ἀπεδόθη. ἡ γυνὴ ἀπέθανεν; ἀπεδόθη. «τὸ χωρίον ἀφῃρέθην». οὐκοῦν καὶ τοῦτο ἀπεδόθη. «ἀλλὰ κακὸς ὁ ἀφελόμενος». τί δὲ σοὶ μέλει, διὰ τίνος σε ὁ δοὺς ἀπῄτησε; μέχρι δ’ ἂν διδῷ, ὡς ἀλλοτρίου αὐτοῦ ἐπιμελοῦ, ὡς τοῦ πανδοχείου οἱ παριόντες.
The scene
Arrian’s Handbook instructs the student to redescribe loss as the return of something lent. The paragraph applies this to a dead child, a dead wife and a confiscated estate, then answers the objection that the taker was a bad person. It ends by requiring care for what is temporarily entrusted to us, as a traveller cares for an inn.
What it means
Treat loved people and possessions as entrusted to you, not as property guaranteed forever. Their loss does not give you permanent ownership of what was never fully yours to keep.
Often misread
This is a demanding Stoic exercise about death and dispossession, not a claim that bereavement is painless or that theft is legally justified. The end of the paragraph calls for care while the loan lasts, not neglect.
Use with care
The paragraph explicitly uses the death of a child or spouse as its example. Do not offer this injunction to a grieving person as if it were an uncomplicated consolation.
Topics
Related quotes
- Remember that it is not he who reviles you or strikes you, who insults you, but it is your opinion about these things as being insulting. When then a man irritates you, you must know that it is your own opinion which has irritated you.
- Let death and exile and every other thing which appears dreadful be daily before your eyes; but most of all death: and you will never think of anything mean nor will you desire anything extravagantly.
- For this is your duty, to act well the part that is given to you; but to select the part, belongs to another.
- You become what you give your attention to. (misattributed)
- one’s whole life must be spent in learning how to live, and, which may perhaps surprise you more, one’s whole life must be spent in learning how to die. Seneca the Younger
Sources
Cite it
Epictetus, Enchiridion (Handbook) (107), Section 11 (opening sentence); George Long translation, chapter XI, translated by George Long. Checked at Quotogeny, https://quotogeny.com/q/never-say-i-have-lost-it/ (31 October 2026).
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