In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made School Boards.
Genuine
Yes. In Following the Equator (1897), Chapter LXI, epigraph from Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar, said by Pudd’nhead Wilson. These are the character’s words, not a statement in Twain’s own voice.
Found word for word by program in the full text.
- Work
- Following the Equator, 1897
- Where
- Chapter LXI, epigraph from Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar
- Found at
- Paragraph 1938 of the text
Researched by AI; checked by program against the full text on 31 October 2026. Editorial review: pending. How we check
On the page
For color, and picturesqueness, and novelty, and outlandishness, and sustained interest and fascination, it was the most satisfying show I had ever seen, and I suppose I shall not have the privilege of looking upon its like again.
In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then He made School Boards. —Pudd’nhead Wilson1’s New Calendar.
Suppose we applied no more ingenuity to the instruction of deaf and dumb and blind children than we sometimes apply in our American public schools to the instruction of children who are in possession of all their faculties? […]
I received a curious letter one day, from the Punjab (you must pronounce it Punjawb). The handwriting was excellent, and the wording was English —English, and yet not exactly English. […]
The scene
The calendar maxim opens a chapter contrasting carefully graded instruction for deaf and blind children with the excessive jumps in difficulty Twain finds in ordinary American schooling. He then discusses Indian graduates trained for far more clerical positions than the economy offers.
What it means
School boards are mocked as a perfected form of foolishness. The following discussion gives the criticism a target: instruction poorly matched to children’s capacities and education poorly matched to employment.
Often misread
The epigraph is not a rejection of all education. Its accompanying argument praises instruction adapted to the learner and criticizes the way educational institutions organize it.
Topics
Related quotes
- cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Adam was but human—this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple’s sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden.
- When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
- Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt. (misattributed)
- Put all your eggs in one basket—and watch that basket.
Sources
Cite it
Mark Twain, Following the Equator (1897), Chapter LXI, epigraph from Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar. Spoken by Pudd’nhead Wilson. Checked at Quotogeny, https://quotogeny.com/q/god-made-idiots-then-school-boards/ (31 October 2026).
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Checked by people
People who checked this entry against its source, under their own names. Their checks do not change the verdict: an editor reviews every entry.

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